The Freedom in Letting Go
But that’s not how things should be. I thought in exasperation.
Most of us, if not all, have a strong sense of justice. And since God is a God of justice - and we are made in His image - it makes sense we do too.
We all know things will never be perfect in this fallen world.
We also know God will make all things right – someday.
But what about now?
How do we let go of the hurt and pain in our lives today caused by injustices?
I don’t know if my desire is valid or merely my ever-present pride rumbling beneath the surface decrying “that’s not fair!”.
But while I see injustices all around me, I can’t help but be convicted myself.
As the saying goes, when you point one accusing finger outward, three are pointing back at you.
Better yet as Jesus said, before pointing out the speck in your brothers eye get the log out of your own (Matthew 7:3).
If I wanted true justice in the world, I would have never been born due to the sins I would commit in my lifetime.
As Paul says, I am the chief of sinners - and I’m standing right next to him (1 Timothy 1:15).
But how do we handle those everyday injustices done to us? Things like:
Insults
Unrequited love
Being overlooked
Being unappreciated
Not receiving services rendered
We Have a Choice
While these things hurt, it’s important to know we have no control over what others say and do.
A wise counselor once told me:
We can control
Our words
Our actions
Our reactions
Our feelings
We can’t control
Others’ words
Others’ actions
Others’ reactions
Others’ feelings
It can be easy to get caught up in the moment when feelings are intense and react.
I forget, more often than not, to take the “pause”.
“Between stimulus and response, there is a space. In that space is our power to choose our response. In our response lies our growth and our freedom”
Or sometimes I allow my hurt feelings to stew and then I burst. Which isn’t helpful at all.
Plus I almost always hurt someone in the process.
Good News
The good – no awesome – news is that GOD LOVES YOU. And me!
When others don’t act or treat us as they should, we know the most important being in the entire universe loves us.
Does that instantly remove the pain? Not always.
And it’s okay to feel pain and hurt. It’s sad when someone we love doesn’t love us. It’s hurtful when we are rejected by someone who should love and protect us, it’s okay to be angry when things aren’t fair, etc.
God gave us feelings for a reason. One of which, I believe, is to experience just a little of what He feels.
Scripture tells us the Lord Jesus was mistreated in many ways. And we know God has been rejected by man from the beginning.
Freedom
While it’s healthy to acknowledge our feelings and process them, we don’t want to wallow in them forever.
After a time, we can turn to the Lord for a loving embrace and place our feelings in His more than capable hands. To take our feelings – the hurt, pain, etc. – receive comfort from Him, and hopefully learn more about ourselves and God.
Then let go.
Chances are the perpetrator isn’t going to know or care they’ve hurt us. And some people can’t or won’t change.
After all, when we focus on being compassionate, kind, humble, patient, etc. there’s not much room for anything else (Colossians 3:12-13).
What if the hurt and pain are still too much?
Consulting with your minister or a mental health professional may be needed and that’s okay. Just as we wouldn’t expect someone to fix their own broken arm or heart problems, our mental health sometimes needs professional attention as well.
When we are able to let go of those we can’t change we are free to focus on the beauty in our lives – the people who do love and cherish us and the friends who will stick by our side through thick and thin.
And most importantly, our God who never leaves us or forsakes us and lavishes a love on us so grand we could never fully comprehend it.
For more encouragement and inspiration check out these other posts:
