How I Overcame Obsessive Thoughts

I had paid for a service not rendered. Not only had the employee messed up, but he also tried to blame us for his mistake. I called to speak with the owner of the company to air my complaint only to be told she would “look into it and get back with me.” With no apology or compensation offered, she defended her long-time employee and said she would call back at some obscure time in the future.

Five days later I called back. “Oh”, she said. “I didn’t think you expected a call back so soon” (seriously?). She hadn’t investigated the problem yet and when she had, a receptionist called back to let me know everything was okay.

But everything wasn’t okay. I was still very angry at how things were handled and wanted an apology (preferably several) and to be compensated for their mistake.

I asked the receptionist if I could leave a message on the owner’s voicemail. “She doesn’t have voicemail, but I could give her a message”, she replied. While my head was imploding from the shock, I said, “really, she does not have voicemail?” Who doesn’t have voicemail – especially a business - In 2021??

When the owner called back, she left a message on my voicemail. I then called back and left another message with the receptionist expressing how I understood she said things were “okay”, but I was very frustrated how things were handled and wanted to discuss this further with the owner.

*Crickets*

Obsessive Thoughts

With no way of expressing my anger and frustration, I was left with thoughts of what I would say when we finally spoke. They slowly wound around my mind like a cobra methodically suffocating its prey. I did not help either. I thought I would “help God” by mentally throttling the situation instead of totally giving it over to His more than capable hands. Fear also reared its ugly head. Should I actually ever speak to this woman again would I overreact and my voice be shake from so much pent-up anger? Would she blow me off? Would she laugh at me? Would she acquiesce and placate?

I found myself at the bottom of the obsessive thoughts pit. Trapped and mud-laden in a dark, and seemingly unescapable misery.

I knew it was wrong. I knew it was not of God, but I was at a loss. While prayer, Scripture reading, and researching articles online helped, I was still struggling. It was not until the Lord revealed the final blow through this Beth Moore teaching I experienced sweet relief.

Freedom

Finally, I had my peace back praise God - my blessed priceless peace. The chains had been broken and I was left gasping for breath now free of the suffocating thoughts. Oh, the glorious feeling of freedom and feeling “normal” once again.

About ten days later, this message came through my voicemail, “Hi, I just got back from vacation and heard you may have some questions?...”.

Have you had a similar experience? If so, how have you dealt with obsessive thoughts?