Marriage

As you come to him, a living stone rejected by men but in the sight of God chosen and precious, you yourselves like living stones are being built up as a spiritual house, to be a holy priesthood, to offer spiritual sacrifices acceptable to God through Jesus Christ. For it stands in Scripture:

“Behold, I am laying in Zion a stone,
a cornerstone chosen and precious,
and whoever believes in him will not be put to shame.” (1 Peter 2: 4-6 ESV)

Does the thought of sacrifice make you cringe? It did me at one time. Even though we may spend our lives trying to avoid it, it has been a part of our relationship with God from the beginning. Even before the garden of Eden - when God decided to create humans - He knew our sin would require sacrifice on His part.

If our holy and pure God sacrificed for us from the beginning, most notably giving of His One and Only Son Jesus to pay the price for our sins, whatever gave us the notion we would not have to sacrifice in this life (or is it just me?)?

Enter marriage. One of the most (eh hem) refining relationships there is. And possibly one of the most difficult in which to sacrifice.

mustard rectangle.png — *If we are critical and cutting to our spouse… we are not pleasing the Lord.*

I appeal to you therefore, brothers by the mercies of God, to present your bodies as a living sacrifice, holy and acceptable to God, which is your spiritual worship (Romans 12:1 ESV).

Our marriages can be a our living sacrifices to God.

We can think we are being holy, pure, and righteous. We can think we are being spiritual - praying, going to church, and attending Bible studies. But if we are critical and cutting to our spouse, having bad thoughts about them, and viewing them as not worthy our time and sacrifice we are not pleasing the Lord.

We cannot worship the Lord in truth and spirit while mistreating our spouse (John 4:23).

Paul said our marriages are a physical representation of our spiritual relationship with the Lord – a testimony to the world of Christ’s love and commitment to us (Ephesians 5:32). Jesus is the groom and we saints are the bride of Christ, the Church.

We must have a consistency, a fluidity, between our relationship with Jesus and our relationship with our spouse. Are you in love with Jesus? Are you in love with your spouse? If the answer to both questions is not yes, we have work to do.

Fan the Flame

We must fan the flame in both our relationship with the Lord and our spouse (2 Timothy 1:6). This requires time and efforts, but the dividends return 10-fold!

We can do this through spending time in:

Prayer
Praises
Bible Study
Books, blogs, podcasts, and more.

Then apply what we have learned.

You may be thinking, If I do all this work and all the sacrificing, I’ll be miserable. Life will be a drudgery serving my spouse!

Jesus knows. He knows our concerns about surrendering and sacrificing for Him and our spouse. That is why He tells us through the Peter passage above when we trust in Him, we will never be put to shame. We can trust Him with our lives and sacrifices.

He promises the following:

God Will Lift Us Up

When we humble ourselves by serving others, God will lift us up. Our lives are not our own. We can trust God to take care of our needs when we serve others in His name.

Humble yourselves, therefore, under the mighty hand of God so that at the proper time he may exalt you (1 Peter 5:6 ESV)

God Sees

God sees and will not forget the work and love we have shown others by serving them.

For God is not unjust so as to overlook your work and the love that you have shown for his name in serving the saints, as you still do. (Hebrews 6:10 ESV)

We Will Reap

We will reap a harvest if we persevere and do not give up.

And let us not grow weary of doing good, for in due season we will reap, if we do not give up. So then, as we have opportunity, let us do good to everyone, and especially to those who are of the household of faith. (Galatians 6: 9-10 ESV)

Serving your spouse by sacrificing and being selfless will be rewarded. For me that has been a blessed inner peace! A peace the whole world wants, but no money can buy. It is a peace that comes from surrender and obedience to God (see more of our story here).

A laying down of my rights and my will and a willingness to love and serve God by loving and serving my spouse, all the while trusting God with the outcome.

Do you want peace? Surrender to God. Lean on Him to fill you to overflowing to pour out to others.

For we are his workmanship, created in Christ Jesus for good works, which God prepared beforehand, that we should walk in them. (Ephesians 2:10 ESV)

What blessings have you seen from the sacrifices in your own life and marriage?