4 Steps to Overcoming Vacation Stress
Photo by Sharon McCutcheon on Unsplash
“That will be $673.” That was not part of the vacation budget, I thought. I was so anxious to leave the dealership I nearly threw my credit card at the man across the counter. He had scheduled and fixed our car same day and was a godsend. It had been a long couple of days of uncertainty and waiting. Two days prior, a different mechanic told us the car would be fixed next day only to be told by his co-worker the following morning it would not *sigh*. The pressure mounted as feelings of dread threatened to deflate my “God will work it all out” balloon used to buoy my family at such times. We were in a different state headed for a beach vacation when the car started making that sound. The sound you really hope is simply the charm of driving a well-seasoned vehicle but can’t deny something is definitely wrong.
Once fixed, we were on our way and the rest of the vacation went off without a hitch. But while waiting and wondering, I had plenty of time to process all the reasons vacations stress me out.
Planning
Vacations come around far to infrequently, so the pressure is on to produce the ideal experience. I tend to be the detail oriented one in the family and plan the bulk of the vacations. This means it’s all on me (or so it feels). This once a year (possibly twice) experience requires multiple decision making; the beach/mountains/city? Hotel, condo, or camping? A low budget hang-out or a splurge on hard-to-forget experiences? Etc. Not to mention the gingerly allotment of precious vacation days beforehand. This alone can cause a panic attack.
“Vacations come around far to infrequently, so the pressure is on to produce the ideal experience.”
Packing
Packing is like making a meal. It seems to take forever to think of everything you may need for your trip and pack (meal prepping) but unpacking takes about 30 seconds (eating the meal). For this very reason I rank packing right up there with cleaning. I love the results of all the hard work, but it can leave you feeling exhausted and be undone in a split second.
Restricted
Dear Mom, you get me, right? Sitting for hours – especially in a car where I can’t get up and move about at will – can challenge my sanity! When my kids were little, sitting was a luxury, but as most of us know a household cannot run while you are sitting so constant movement is almost always my norm. My family jokes how hard it is to talk to a moving target (I really work on this). I prefer to watch movies at home because I have the freedom to pause the movie and move about at any time. You would think I could make a significant dent in my to-do list having hours at my disposal while traveling to our destination, but motion sickness has kiboshed any semblance of real progress.
Money
We can skip this part, right? No one is going anywhere without considering finances. Either budgeting for vacation ahead of time or paying it off afterward (not recommended), money is a necessity when planning a trip. It’s life’s little surprises (and sometimes big) that can foil our perfect plans. The extra night in a hotel while the car is being fixed, the cost of the car being fixed, the extra meal out because we are on vacation (bye-bye $100), the unplanned excursions because the kids really want to do it and you really want to make good memories and don’t want to be a bad parent and its vacation and …
Being Out of Control
“Start with an attitude of gratitude”
I am a research kind of girl. Whatever it is, I want the best experience possible, so I research – a lot. Whether it be mechanical, health, or a plethora of other issues, being unfamiliar with your surroundings puts you at the mercy of others. When you don’t know the area or the reputation of those around you, it can be unnerving. Reviews help, but only if you have the time and means to access the ones recommended.
So, what’s my solution? How can I enjoy vacation even with all the variables involved?
1. Start with an attitude of gratitude. This may sound cliché but essential when shifting our perspective. As I was venting to God how things weren’t going my way on this trip, I listed all things I was grateful for, and my attitude did a 180! I’m sure it was no coincidence I had just read a Voice of the Martyrs newsletter about the persecuted church around the world. The internal battle was real as my pity party quickly lost the comparison game.
Photo by Maarten van den Heuvel on Unsplash
2. Relax and remember I don’t have control over anything - really. God does. I can plan and research with the goal of a wonderful trip but can’t possibly predict (or avoid) every possible scenario. Life in general is unpredictable, whether at home or away. I can also share this with others. We can all agree to go with the flow, enjoy the journey and deal with issues if they arise with the right attitude remembering God is for us. I can also apply this principle of relaxation to impending hours of sitting by mentally preparing myself ahead of time with plenty of interesting audiobooks and podcasts at the ready.
3. Involve the family in the planning. What would others love to see or do? This will take pressure off to plan the perfect getaway for everyone and distribute the accountability. Then make a list including something everyone would like to do.
4. Pad the budget. Vacations are like home improvement projects; they almost always cost more than expected. Sticking to a budget is important on several levels, but so is leaving a little wiggle room for some spontaneous fun! God is generous with us His children and I know we like to be generous with ours too. Sometimes, seeing the sparkle in our child’s eyes when we say yes to that special request makes it worth the sacrifice.
So, the next time you get ready to plan a vacation, stop, take a long breath and remember the steps above. All of life is an adventure. Even when things don’t go your way and the car breaks down.
